Is there much difference between comments like, “Oh, I didn’t spend that much on your gifts,” and “My trip to the salon only cost $100” (when it was really $300)? While the intent behind spending a little extra on gifts to make your partner happy and lying by omission about a purchase to avoid a money fight are different, the half-truths still result in the same thing: Not being honest about expenses. And secret spending, in any, way, shape, or form, could tank your marriage and lead to divorce.
Money Lies and the Demise of Marriage
Financial infidelity is real, and for some couples it can be much harder to overcome than any sort of physical infidelity. Skeptical? In a LendEDU survey about relationships and personal finance, 32.25 percent of the people surveyed said honesty about personal finance is more important than honesty about fidelity. Yikes.
How rampant is all this underhandedness about dollars and cents? A 2016 Harris Poll conducted for the National Endowment for Financial Education found that over four in 10 adults in the United States report purposely deceiving their partners when it comes to household financial matters. Even worse, 75 percent of respondents said that these deceptions negatively impacted their relationship.
How Money Makes You Feel
If you are in a marriage where one person is perfectly happy taking over the reins for bills and expenses, it can be hard to say no. However, that doesn’t mean you should turn a blind eye to what money is coming in and going out. Communicating about finances and being transparent about spending is essential to a healthy relationship.
The good news discovered in the LendEDU survey is that even if someone’s significant other had major financial problems like credit card debt or bankruptcy, nearly 95 percent of people would stay in the relationship (nice to know gold digging isn’t rampant). That would lead us to believe that it’s the emotional element of financial infidelity that is far more painful than the monetary infidelity.
The Danger of Money Secrets
While prenups have never been looked upon all that favorably in modern culture, they perhaps deserve a second glance for their ability to prompt financial fidelity. There are no secrets with prenups – everything is out on the table when it comes to assets. And talking about the big-ticket items opens up the door to discuss all financial matters in your relationship, both small and large. This can only be beneficial to a union, even when you and your partner don’t see eye-to-eye.
Truth is a cornerstone of a healthy marriage. And even though higher-income relationships were less stressed by money issues, according to LendEDU, these relationships were also more likely to be party to deception, like a secret credit card or bank account.
Regardless of what economic tier you find yourself on, and whether or not finances are at the root of your marriage problems, if you need advice about getting a Michigan divorce, make an appointment with an experienced Michigan divorce attorney at Femminineo Attorneys in Mt. Clemens, MI, to schedule your no-cost initial interview.